Royally Screwed Read online

  He performed quick ablutions in the bathroom then misted downstairs. Everyone’s concerned eyes, including those of the two witches, focused on him immediately as he materialized. It humbled the king to know he had not just loyal subjects but damned good friends.

  “Our queen is well, but worried that Beletseri might soon consider her irrelevant. She implores us to hurry to her rescue.” He couldn’t hide the anguish in his voice. “The only clue she gave me to her whereabouts were two final words. I can’t make sense of them and neither can Lahar or Shamash.”

  That did not auger well, as the two had the most brilliant minds in residence.

  “Her words were ‘go’ and ‘sit’.” Nergal put it out there, looking from face to face to see if anyone had a clue. He received a lot of blank looks. Even the ever-ready-with-a-solution Lenore seemed at a loss. He’d worried this would be the case. Nergal sighed.

  “Well, if anyone comes up with something, please let me know immediately. I need to get back to the Underworld and take care of pressing business, so you can find me there. I’ll return in two nights when it’s time for Beletseri to move Ereshkigal again. Hopefully she will tell me more.” He looked to Shamash, who’d had as little sleep as the king. “I hate to ask this of you, but would it be possible for you to leave things here at the compound for a short while to help my security staff beef things up in the Underworld?”

  Shamash had made a good start with the glowies, particularly Lavarette whom Nergal had put in charge of guarding and safekeeping things down below. This particular band of semi-translucent individuals had been lost for centuries in the far depths of Hell, and upon their reintroduction to Nergal’s realm, had become invaluable to the king. They were smart, they were loyal, and they embodied a sense of fun that most demons who made the levels of Hades their home lacked. Nergal had taken quick advantage and elevated the entire glowie collective—a couple thousand beings—to class one status.

  The only problem with their having had no contact with the outside world for millennium was their lack of technology. It was not lost on King Nergal that the group had done admirably well integrating all new concepts into their lives, but it would be much easier if Shamash misted down to give more lessons and to help replace outmoded equipment.

  “Of course, my king,” Shamash acquiesced. “After my duties are complete, I look forward to checking out the glowies new underground spa. I hear they’ve completely renovated the hot spring grotto. It’ll be a good off-time spot to restore my energies.”

  “Good.” Nergal nodded. “Join me within the hour.” And because every eye on him appeared worried, he added, “I’ll be fine. Just get me my woman back.” Nergal disappeared, no fanfare, no puff of smoke, just a dejected bit of mist. It was all he could conjure.

  A brief silence ensued after he left.

  “Man that sucks.” Marduk perceived that Enten drew his Chosen, Glory closer. He clearly remembered when she’d been kidnapped. “I hope that—”

  Marduk’s cell phone chimed, interrupting his musing. Since everyone in the group except Hux and Dani were accounted for—Mr. Abelard cruised halfway to Bermuda at this point—without even looking at caller ID, he knew it had to be the pair in Maine.

  “Yeah, Hux?” Marduk kept quiet and listened. With every word Huxley uttered, his brows grew closer together. Gods. Why did everything always have to be so fucked up? Marduk sighed into the phone.

  “Yeah. Okay. But be careful and watch your ass on the way home.” He paused for a moment. “Do you need backup?”

  “Nope. We’re good,” Huxley assured him.

  “Call if you need us. We’ll be looking out for you.” Marduk punched his phone off and wasted no time filling everybody in.

  “He got up there and did some looking around on foot. The house had neither been broken into nor was there any cop waiting for him.” He paused amidst growls of outrage. “But what disturbs me most is that no bad guys waited there to ambush him either. The place was deserted. That’s not like anything Beletseri’s done before.”

  “So what do you think?” Enlil asked. “What does Hux think?”

  “He’s not sure. And I’m not sure either, but one disturbing occurrence came to light while he poked around. A woman stopped by his place while the neighbor’s boy mowed the lawn and asked for Hux. She said she was an old friend of his, but didn’t stick around. When Huxley got her description, he couldn’t place her.”

  “Do you think this woman is working for Beletseri?” Enlil looked as skeptical as Marduk felt. Beletseri was not a woman’s woman. She worked for males, socialized with males, and eschewed anything female. Unless the human, Matthew, had done some recruiting of his own, the goddess would never make an initial move using anything but testosterone.

  “Your guess is as good as mine,” Marduk pondered. “But if that’s the case, then their next move might be to lure us to another known address. Perhaps Lenore’s beach place or Dani’s apartment. We can’t be sure, so we need to be careful.”

  “Should some of the guys who can stay invisible follow Huxley in case he has a tail?” Enlil clearly wanted to do it but, since Huxley was a descendant of his, he had no choice but to be embodied around him. And that meant “splat” on the highway.

  “Hux says it doesn’t look like he’s being followed, and it could just be a ploy to get some of us out in the open, so the answer is no. Unless he calls, we all stay put.” Marduk observed frowns. He didn’t like it much either, but he wasn’t going to borrow trouble.

  “Nergal can detect god energy at a great distance,” Enlil speculated. “I’m going to give him a quick call and have him scan the highway between Bangor and here to make sure no immortals are lying in wait.”

  “Good idea.” Marduk rubbed his neck. “And the rest of you, put your mind to those two words: go and sit. Try to think outside the box. Hux and Dani should be home in a few hours. We’ll reconvene then.”

  Marduk sat down at the table and attacked the cold omelet his wife made for him. It was a little rubbery but, at this point, nothing would sit well on his stomach.

  Glory’s mother had been present for the whole meeting—well attended by Emesh, the god of summer and Glory’s new god brother-in-law. Despite her Alzheimer’s, she’d seemingly taken in all the information that had been presented.

  Patting Marduk on the shoulder now, she got up to be escorted back to the cottage where she stayed with the witches. As she left, Marduk heard Kate string the two words he’d said in an absent minded, sing-songy way.

  “Go and sit. Sit and go. Sit, sit, sit, then go, go, go.”

  Why did it seem almost familiar?

  ****

  Several hours later, Dani sighed as Huxley maneuvered the bike into the garage. Unlike the trip up, Huxley conveyed his worries to her on the way home. She’d listened and made a few comments, marveling that he’d opened up, but he seemed to have a lot on his mind.

  Dani was extremely grateful she hadn’t been caught following Huxley to the farmhouse. She’d taken one look at the intact front door of the house, realized they’d been sent on a fool’s mission, and legged it back to the motorcycle to await Huxley’s return. She did her best to look ignorant of the facts when Huxley brusquely filled her in that there had been no breaking and entering, so they needed to get the hell out of there, fast, in case it was a setup.

  Now, hours later, no breakfast, no lunch, Dani felt ready to drop and teetered a bit as she swung her leg off the bike. Huxley quickly followed and slung a steady arm around her waist. Without meaning to, Dani leaned into him for support. His hold became tighter.

  “You’ll get your legs back under you in a minute.” His voice nestled warm in her ear, and Dani found herself giving his cheek a small rub with the side of her head.

  She didn’t know what was up with him. Nice now, asshole earlier. It confused her that he gave such mixed signals, but she’d decided on the way home that she could only be true to what she felt. Let him sort through things. When he
gave her the opportunity to get close, she would to take advantage of it. Dani swayed a little bit more. This time on purpose.

  “Just relax. The rubber legs will pass,” Huxley murmured in a low voice. “I’m sorry I didn’t stop for food on the way home, but we couldn’t be sure if someone had us under surveillance.”

  Enlil had let them know the king had given the road the “all clear” of immortals during the ride home, but Huxley told her that something still nagged at him, raising the hairs on the back of his neck. And he never ignored his feelings.

  Dani turned in Huxley’s grip and lightly placed her arms around his ribcage, even though he stiffened. “You’re right. I’ll be good in a few minutes, especially if I get something to eat.” She sighed contentedly. She didn’t care when she got her next calories. He smelled so good, it took all her fortitude not to nuzzle his neck.

  “Uh…Dani?” He gently lifted her arms away, and she gave a small sound of protest. “We need to get upstairs and see what’s going on.”

  Dani-Lee gave up and followed him to the elevator, stumbling only a little but keeping her eyes on the floor. If she raised them, Huxley would see the raw desire that she’d become too tired to hide. She figured he wouldn’t like it one bit.

  The ride to the upper floor seemed to take forever.

  ****

  We’re back. Huxley sent head-speak to the house at large, even though surveillance obviously showed them arriving. But since he was one of the only humans with whom the gods could do the mind-speak thing, he tended to show off a little. Of course, everyone now realized he owned that skill because of a double injection of immortal in his system.

  In my office, he got back from Marduk, but his feet were already headed in that direction.

  Huxley noticed that everyone had convened, waiting for him, and he brought the group up to speed. After he finished, they let him know all that had gone down with Nergal and the queen.

  He found himself just as puzzled as the rest over the words she’d spoken, and amid a flurry of Absu unacquiring food to the conference table in front of him and a starving Dani, his erstwhile companion dared to throw out what she considered a good next move.

  “I think I should go back to my apartment and to my job. I talked to my landlord and he said my space hasn’t been rented out yet. He still has my security deposit, and if I send him a month’s rent, he’ll hold the place for me.” She stated it perfunctorily between mouthfuls of a delicious jambalaya that Huxley now ingested the wrong way.

  “I’m not a god or a goddess,” she said while Hux coughed and spluttered. “I’m not related to any one of you in any way. I’m not a potential Chosen. I seriously doubt I’m of any value to your adversaries but,”

  Ah shit. She wore that serious look she got right before she dropped a bomb.

  “I could make myself seem valuable to infiltrate their hiding place. All I have to do is make them think I’ve turned my back on you, and I might look useful to them.”

  Dani let that hang for a moment. Huxley followed what she said, and the attending gods looked like they did too. Dani’s head crooked at an angle as she continued. “They could want me because I already know there are such a thing as gods, and I’ve proven myself an asset by operating on you. Helping immortals heal.”

  Huxley felt his face go red. “Do you have any idea how little these assholes value life? Do you not remember what they did to Glory?” he sputtered.

  “An entirely different situation,” Dani reasoned. “She was a Chosen. They needed you to know they meant business, and shot her to show they held all the cards while negotiating for Nergal’s idol. They have no reason to harm me if I’m not important to you.” She tipped her head, pondering. “Also, if I’m judging Beletseri correctly, she will have realized how easily you gods defeat humans, and she’ll be using otherworldly beings to help her now. Beings I can patch up.”

  Marduk and Enlil looked thoughtful, which pissed Huxley right the hell off.

  “You can’t possibly be listening to her,” he growled. “She’ll be completely at risk—”

  Dani interrupted him. “I’ll wear a tracking device at all times, and as soon as they take me as bait, you’ll be able to follow me. And don’t argue.” She pointed directly at Huxley. “You need someone who can get on the inside, and none of you are a possibility. We can sit for weeks waiting for them to make a mistake, or we can act now. The queen’s life could depend upon it.”

  Huxley hated it, but several of the gods looked like they actually contemplated her proposal.

  “We’ll keep it under consideration.” Marduk nodded. “But just in case, let’s get your landlord a check ASAP.” He cut off Huxley’s next protests. “We won’t make any decisions until the next time Nergal talks to Ereshkigal. The queen may be able to give us something more definitive regarding her location, and then we won’t need to use Dani-Lee.”

  Huxley nodded brusquely. He’d make sure in the ensuing two days that he talked everybody out of Dani’s crazy idea.

  “Hey, guys?” Lahar stuck his head in the door. The god had been keeping tabs on the meeting via camera, but also kept his eyes to the security system since Shamash remained in the Underworld. “I think we might have a problem.”

  All heads turned. Hux shook his. What else could possibly go wrong?

  “There’s a woman wandering around outside of the perimeter. She doesn’t look like a hiker, and she pretty much fits the description of the woman who was looking for Huxley up in Maine.”

  Chapter Seven

  “I’ll take care of this.” Enlil stepped up and approached Lahar. “Let’s go check out the footage.” Before he took off, he turned to Hux and his sisters. “I hate to ask this, but could the three of you position yourselves so I don’t go ghost on our visitor if I need to confront her outside? One of you should go to the west end of the house in the kitchen, while another heads to the east ballroom, and someone stays in the middle gym to cover my north to south trajectory.”

  “Hell no.” Huxley growled. “I’m going with you.”

  “Wrong,” Marduk told him. “If this is the woman who’s after you, you will stay hidden.” It wasn’t a suggestion, but an order from the boss of the gods.

  Hux didn’t like it, but he’d agree…for now. “Only if Enlil keeps me in the loop by head. I want to know everything that’s going on.”

  “I can do better than that.” Lahar disappeared and quickly came back in, handing him a laptop. “Now you’ll see everything we see on our big monitors, as well as being kept in touch by brain.”

  “Is that okay with you, Marduk?” Huxley asked a little snarkily.

  “Fine.” Marduk nodded, not acknowledging Hux’s mood.

  Tess quickly agreed that she would take the west end, Holly with Dagon in tow chose the ballroom, and by default Huxley would head to the gym with the portable computer. And while he was there, he’d damn well make his time productive. He turned to Dani.

  He looked at her nearly empty plate. “Digest fast, doc. And find some comfortable clothes. You’re about to get your first lesson in self-defense.” He saw Dani stiffen. Too bad if she wasn’t onboard with the idea.

  In the meantime, everyone else accompanied Lahar to the god’s tech room, where all the cameras, monitors, computers, and other of his and Shamash’s goodies were housed. It included the gods-named GTS; a god’s transceiver station that allowed for mind communication over long distances. Without it, the gods—Nergal and Ereshkigal the exception, as well as mated couples—had a ten-mile radius of mind-speak. The GTS used existing human cell towers to extend that and give the group an almost unlimited range.

  Huxley had his ears on, listening in while he waited for Dani. His eyes remained fixed on one of the exterior camera feeds that showed on the laptop.

  “There she is,” Lahar said. Hux observed the figure, now on the west side of the compound, looking down at a device in her hands and attempting to walk through a barrier she couldn’t see. The gods witness
ed her being swept in a split second from the west side of the compound to the east, which is what the protective boundary did to humans. It was pretty genius, their privacy system. It allowed hikers and bikers to continue on a planned trajectory without encountering the gods’ home.

  But this woman did not take the transitions well. She glanced down at the device in her hand, spun around in place, and looked back over her shoulder. She approached the unseen blockade again, and was transported back to the west side in a blink.

  “How long has she been at it?” Enlil asked Lahar.

  “About fifteen minutes, and it looks like she’s not about to give up,” he answered.

  Someone took the mouse and zoomed in on the woman because the image got bigger on Huxley’s screen. They freeze framed her, getting a good look at what she held in her hand.

  “Shit,” the wind god swore. “Ishkur?”

  The gray-haired god who cared for the on-premise motorcycles responded quickly. “I get it, Enlil. Hux came in with a tracking device on his bike.”

  “Dammit,” Huxley swore. “When did someone get to my bike? I didn’t leave it alone for—” Huxley broke off. He had left his bike. But Dani-Lee had been watching it…or had she? The woman in question chose that moment to walk into the gym, and her long, bare legs made Huxley nearly forget what he needed to ask her. Nearly. He swallowed both his suspicions and his lust. Workout first, questions later.

  “On it, Enlil.” Ishkur clearly had popped down to the garage.

  The voices continued in Huxley’s head despite his interaction with Dani.

  “Consider it found and killed,” Ishkur assured.

  Back to the action in the computer room.

  “Have you seen anyone else with her?” Enlil questioned Lahar.

  “I’ve sent out my immortal-detection senses and haven’t felt any god energy,” Lahar answered. “And I’ve scouted her and the surrounding area carefully. It seems like she’s flying solo.”