Blown Away Read online

  Candy snorted. It would be a long time before she went down on the asshole again. The way she’d been dismissed afterward, she’d rather suck the head off an anaconda.

  “He didn’t say much.”

  Was Shamash trying to minimize Enlil’s melt down?

  “He did mention he would be the one going to LA with you.”

  Candy narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “And how is it he allowed you inside my room if he thinks he’s the one?” she questioned. If a man staked a claim, he didn’t just hand you over to the next dude in line, especially with the territorial uber-aggression these gods exhibited around their Chosen.

  Shamash shrugged. “He merely agreed I should have my fifteen minutes.”

  Candy scooted to the door and eased it open, looking left and right into an empty hallway.

  “He walked away without keeping tabs on us?” She drew her head back in, incredulous. Candy was fully aware Shamash wouldn’t attempt any hanky-panky. But did Enlil know that? “He’d let me do to you what I did…” Candy caught herself, but not quite in time.

  “Hmm?” Shamash looked amused. “What exactly did you do with Enlil?” he asked with a broad grin. “The wind god definitely wasn’t himself when he left.”

  “None of your business,” groused Candy. “Let’s just say I’m pissed off he’s so easily willing to tap out to the next guy on the tag team.” She chewed her lower lip. An evil glint came into her eyes. “Tag team,” she mused. “Yeah. That would serve the bastard right.”

  She turned her eyes, which she knew sparked dangerously, in Sham’s direction. “Are you willing to tug the bull’s tail a little more tonight, Shamash?”

  He stepped back a couple of feet. “Oh shit, Candy.” The immortal groaned. “Do I even want to ask?”

  “Listen.” She felt no remorse as she got wound up. “He was going to let you come in here and do your thing, but once he thinks about it and realizes he doesn’t want to share, he’ll probably kill us both in our sleep anyway. So, here’s what I’ve got planned.”

  Two minutes later, and purposely disheveled, Shamash allowed Candy to drag him down the hall and around the corner toward Enlil’s suite. When she’d gotten the proper look on her face, Candy knocked.

  Open up, big guy. I’ve got a smokin’ hot proposition for you. Candy sent it from her head into Enlil’s, and therefore―with her lack of skills―into every other god’s and goddess’s brain in the house.

  Shamash groaned. “From here on out, will you use your out loud words, please?”

  Candy just grinned.

  Enlil wrenched open the door and his cautious look quickly turned to one of furious condemnation as he noticed Shamash’s shirt buttoned incorrectly, his lack of shoes, and the top button to his jeans popped open. Candy could almost see the wheels turning in his head. That they’d come to rub Sham’s conquest in his face. Candy bit back a chortle. What had it been? Like eight minutes since Enlil left? My, she’d certainly used the time well if Enlil’s imagination could be believed.

  Candy took the lead and looped a hand into the top of Shamash’s jeans, teasing him forward while at the same time shoving Enlil none too gently―square in his bare, magnificent chest―back into his room.

  I have a proposition. She licked her lips and stared up at the irate god.

  “Speak it out loud,” Enlil bit out between clenched teeth. “It’s bad enough you brought Shamash to my room. Now you want the other gods to know what you have done? What you want to do?”

  What? Candy batted her eyelashes at him innocently. I’m only talking to my two lover boys. Candy was fully aware she broadcasted to the entire household, but it figured as part of her strategy. And Enlil was a god about to be played.

  She couldn’t count the number of times her dupes, while working undercover, believed they were about to have some hot sex, only to be busted, big time, before she showed even a naked elbow.

  I just assumed since we’re trying to figure out which one of you is my true mate, we shouldn’t waste time. What better way to see who lights up than to have a little, uh, group effort? Candy made her posture seductive.

  Enlil, baby. The words came from outside of the room. You need to jump on that hot ménage. And if you do, would you please tell my husband how good it is? Lenore’s voice purred, full of lust. Enlil groaned and Candy suppressed a smile. Leave it to Lenore.

  Anshar chimed in. Don’t listen to her, Enlil. Two girls, one guy, I’m in. Two guys, one girl? Major gross out. Gods. What if Shamash slips and…

  A chorus of laughter erupted in Candy’s head, and while Enlil remained distracted, she sent a hand out, approaching his crotch while she simultaneously rubbed the other across Shamash’s chest. It had the intended effect.

  “What the fuck, Shamash?” Enlil looked like he couldn’t believe his friend would go along with this. “You were supposed to straighten things out.”

  “Yeah, but what Candy says makes some sense, Enlil.” Shamash did a piss-ass stab at appearing logical―which was his freakin’ job, right? Candy tweaked his left nipple with insistent fingers. He’d better sound more convincing.

  He tried again. “You know we don’t always light up on the first try, and if we can lessen the burden on Candy and work as a team, the number of encounters we’d have to have would be far fewer.”

  Come on, you guys. Candy added to the persuasive scene. Her hand snaked its way around Enlil and into his pajama bottoms to cup his muscular ass. Mmm, yes. As luscious as she’d imagined. I’ve read about your ancient times, she coerced. Bacchus and wine, Caligula and orgies.

  Enlil shook his head and jumped backward, wrenching away from her roaming digits.

  Remind her that was Rome, big boy. Emesh, from across the hall, sounded highly amused. Debauched sons of bitches they might have been, but boy could those guys par-tay.

  Yet another voice chimed in. Alert me if you are in need of any assistance, Enlil. A raw edge abraded Absu’s proper words. The ladies ne’er had complaint with my prowess in the old days, and I would happily provide instruction in disrobing the fine damsel…or contributing anything else she may desire.

  Everyone get out of my head. Enlil roared.

  Good. Candy smirked. The wind god finally hit his limit, but even so, she was taken aback with the vehemence of his declaration.

  “And you,” he turned to snarl at Candy, “speak with your mouth.”

  “I can do better things with my mouth, sweet cheeks.” She continued the act and grabbed for his ass again, only to have him back up until he hit the bed. Still, the tent came up under his cotton bottoms. He’d become aroused despite himself.

  Candy waited. Shamash understood what he’d been coached to do, and slowly, looking reluctant, he sidled up behind her.

  She readied herself as the god grasped for her hips. He drew her back against him, and she effected a grinding motion against his pelvis with her behind.

  “Let’s get this party started.” Shamash’s words sounded flat, but by the look simmering in Enlil’s eyes, the wind god was too far gone to notice the bad acting.

  Spinning Candy out of Shamash’s arms, he threw her on the bed, grabbed the misbuttoned front of the logic god’s shirt in one fist, and twisted it up around his neck. Horns appeared on Enlil’s head and―oh shit. Shamash had found some big fucking trouble.

  “You don’t touch her,” Enlil bellowed. “Do you understand?”

  Candy did. Okay. Time to end the charade.

  Enlil cocked back an arm to land a decisive punch when she rammed the back of his knees. He let go of Shamash to keep his balance, which he barely managed, but got further flummoxed when she spun him by one shoulder and violently head-butted directly into his solar plexus. He crashed to the floor, and lay stunned for a moment.

  Enlil blinked an eye up at Candy and shook his head. “What the fuck?” he bellowed, before she stepped on his neck.

  “You want to know, what the fuck, Enlil? Then I’ll tell you.” She let her eyes narrow
, and she hoped Enlil recognized the danger in her pissed off tone. “You let me suck you off, then you sent in your friend like I’m some cheap piece of ass.” Candy’s foot rested at the wind god’s throat.

  He narrowed his eyes.

  Wrong move. She ground her foot downward.

  “You weren’t this selective when we were outside,” he hissed. “You kissed us both.” Enlil had trouble talking through his restricted windpipe, but it didn’t slow down the bullshit. His mistake.

  “Yeah, you big asshole,” Candy readily agreed. “To see if I could figure out which one of you might fit the mate thing you’d been talking about. Then when I let you drag me off to my room, I figured you weren’t stupid. I really believed you understood which one of you rang my bell.”

  He twitched one eyebrow up and slid his gaze back and forth between her and Shamash.

  “And?” he asked, his throat working under her foot. Light dawned slowly, but too late to save himself from retribution.

  Lenore? Candy sent to the goddess. You there?

  Sure am, sweetness. What can I do you for?

  Tell Enlil what someone should do after a close encounter of a sexual nature. Candy hissed. Should he A: Zip up and walk out the door without a word, or B: Tell his new paramour she’s the best he’s ever had and put up with a little after-glow cuddling?

  B. The chorus rang out loud and clear with what sounded like every god and goddess weighing in.

  Great. Not everybody is an ignorant asshole.

  The god beneath her foot turned pale.

  One more guys. Candy kept her eyes glued on Enlil’s face.

  After you leave the room having done the wrong thing, do you go out in the hallway to confront a friend and A: Tell him to get the fuck away or lose a vital part of his anatomy, or B: Give your buddy the big green light to go in and do all things sexual with the slut who just sucked you off?

  Dead silence from the peanut gallery. Satisfaction ripped through Candy’s chest. Nobody in the house could believe Enlil had blown it that badly.

  You are completely screwed, Enlil. Lenore spoke for them all, her voice sorely disappointed.

  “Well.” Candy tried to unclench her fists. “It seems to me that everybody else knows what you should have done.” Candy removed her foot from Enlil’s throat and turned quickly to go, feigning bravado, but not before the sting of tears burned her eyes.

  “Shamash, it looks like you’re coming to LA,” Candy said, over brightly. “Pack your bathing suit.”

  Enlil lay on the floor and fought for the right words, but nothing came out. His tormentor left the room without a backward glance.

  He let out a disgusted groan. Turns out Candy had been right all along. He was an asshole.

  Chapter Five

  “That’s it, Candy, I’m sorry.” Marduk threw up his hands as Candy sat, stormy faced, across from him at the breakfast table. “What do you want me to do? King Nergal has requested Shamash’s computer skills back in the Underworld, and when Nergal says ‘request,’ he means ‘demand’.” Marduk was no more pleased with the travel arrangements than the pissed off agent. After having last night’s debacle between the agent and Enlil up in his head, he had been totally on board with sending Shamash to LA, only to be told otherwise by the king.

  Marduk wanted nothing more than to punish his second in command, and relegate him to guard duty on demons or some other hellish task. However, he now had no choice. The idiot got an all-expense-paid vacation instead of a well-deserved kick in the ass.

  “Enlil will be traveling with you, and will be our man on your team. Jake is okay with it, and you’ll just have to suck it up.”

  “Yeah? I did that and look where it got me.” Candy glared.

  Marduk winced. “Maybe the big dope will get smart and behave himself. He’s been acting way out of character lately.”

  Tess had given Marduk her take on the matter after the broadcasted confrontation last night, and clued him in that a lot of relationships started out in an adversarial way. By their behavior, Tess informed Marduk, she assumed that both Enlil and Candy must have undergone love problems in the past, and were simply fighting it this time around. It was actually for the best―according to her―that they be thrown together. Marduk had his doubts and thought Shamash the better bet.

  “I’m sorry, but I just don’t see sparks between Candy and Sham,” Tess had let him know. “My money is on theirs being the familial relationship. The more Candy and Enlil are with each other, the better chance they have of working it out.” His wife had turned onto her side and gone promptly back to sleep.

  Now Marduk waited with gritted teeth to pass the new travel plans on to the wind god.

  Enlil walked into the kitchen and stopped dead when he spotted Marduk and Candy. He spun on his heal, ostensibly to leave, but Marduk called out, arresting his departure.

  “Enlil. We need to talk,” Marduk barked tersely.

  He got a one-fingered salute from the wind god. “Right, Dad,” Enlil mocked. “You going to take away my car keys for being bad?”

  Candy hissed and threw Enlil a look of disdain before scraping back her chair and stalking from the room. Marduk heard the word “cock-sucker” as she brushed by him. Damn it all.

  “Can’t you just stop being a dick long enough for me to make sense out of things? Please?” Marduk implored.

  The wind deflated from around Enlil, and he picked up an orange from the fruit bowl before sitting down in the seat that Candy had just vacated. “What’s there to talk about?” he groused. “Shamash will be going to LA, and I’ll be here putting up holly and mistletoe.”

  Enlil referred to the preparations the women had begun making to celebrate Christmas ten days away. There’d been a big roundtable discussion about it before the whole DEA raid, and nothing the ancient Mesopotamians could say would deflect the goddesses from their venture. Each one had been brought up celebrating Christmas and would not be deterred by the bunch of pagans they’d married. That their husbands were the actual idolatrous beings of their day only served to amuse the ladies more, and a number of the decorations showing up were equal parts Santa Claus, Jesus, and loin-clothed gods.

  Marduk groaned. “Actually, there’s been a change of plans. You’ll be the lucky one escaping the holiday madness.”

  Enlil snapped upright as the words penetrated. His breath caught and he felt almost hopeful while Marduk continued.

  “Shamash is needed in the Underworld. Which leaves only you to travel with the human team.” Marduk pinned him with a determined stare. “But I want you to promise you’ll play nice with everyone. Including Candy.” He gave Enlil an encouraging nod. “I’m not sure what the hell is up between you two, but Tess is pretty sure Candy is your Chosen, and things have just gotten off to a rocky start. You need to reboot your attitude and treat her with a little more of that cool suave I’m used to seeing.”

  “I can handle myself.” Enlil huffed. Internally, he wondered if that was true.

  “Good.” Marduk sighed.

  Enlil postured arrogantly, pulling on his bluster from ancient days and displaying the hubris that had defined him when he’d had the temple of Ekur built to honor his greatness, even though that confidence was, in actuality, long gone.

  Granted, he’d been the holder of the Tablets of Destiny at the time, and being the ruler of the universe was nothing to scoff at. But Marduk had spent his time with the tablets as well, and when they’d been seized from him―like they’d been taken from Enlil―it hadn’t seemed to destroy the thunder god. Therefore, Enlil couldn’t let on that he was still affected by his loss of supreme power all those years ago.

  Marduk brought him back to present.

  “Listen.” The god leaned closer and spoke in Enlil’s head. I’m sending Ishkur with you as backup in case anything goes wrong and these agents think to betray us. I don’t like having you off on your own where you could get screwed over without us knowing. Marduk let his trepidation show. I’ll worry
about you, Enlil, he admitted. “I’ll miss having you here.” He spoke that out loud.

  “Well, he has to come home for Christmas.” Tess waddled into the kitchen, opened the refrigerator to pluck out a carton of eggs, and laid down the law. “How long does it take to get from the West Coast back home, god style?”

  “Thirty to forty minutes,” Marduk answered. “Depending on wind conditions.” He smirked at Enlil. “Not long enough to use as an excuse not to come home for the joyous holidays.” His sarcasm wasn’t lost on Enlil.

  “Watch out,” Tess teased Marduk. “You’ll get coal in your stocking.”

  Enlil interrupted with a cough before their teasing turned to something else. “My lady, I wouldn’t miss your Christmas for anything.” He stuck his hand over his heart, composing his face into serious lines. “I promise also to make it home for the birth of your son.” His eyes held warmly to Tess, and she smiled. She, at least―being his descendant―could do nothing less than forgive him his assholeishness of the previous night.

  Jake and the agent, Flick, drifted into the room, and Tess commenced cracking eggs. “Omelets all around?” she asked cheerfully, looking back and forth between her husband and the newcomers. They nodded. “So Enlil goes West. Who did you decide will be our permanent guest?” she questioned as Jake poured himself some juice from the pitcher on the table and sat down.

  He took a swig. “If you don’t mind…” He looked a little sheepish. Apparently, Enlil surmised, the agent and Marduk had not yet discussed it. “I’d like to leave Dunsky.”

  Marduk rolled his eyes and Enlil groaned, suddenly glad he was headed to the West Coast.

  Jake shrugged to them in apology. “After the guys found out he’d sold Candy-Land’s ass to that bitch in Maine, they’ve been a little off with him. They believe if he’s left behind, your gods might pound some sense into him.”